In a lengthy sequence completely unconnected to the main plot of the episode, after preventing Osama bin Laden from sending a hostile message to the United States, Stewie, parodying the opening scene from The Naked Gun, rides off on his tricycle, cycling through scenes from various films and video games. He eventually arrives at his house and bikes into the garage where he runs over Homer Simpson, then Peter comes through the door, greets Stewie, looks down on the floor and wonders, "Who the hell is that?"
Peter wakes up Lois by noisily installing a red carpet in his bedroom, anticipating watching the Emmy Awards, but Lois forces him to go to Meg's school play (which resembles the musical Godspell). The next day, Peter learns about David Hyde Pierce's wardrobe malfunction at the Emmys and gets angry at Lois for missing the Emmy Awards and not being able to see it. Having received a small number of phone calls from citizens concerning the incident, the FCC decides to censor any content from television even the slightest that could be feared harmful to viewers under the orders of their chairman, Cobra Commander; the censorship is applied to such content as Chrissy Snow's cleavage from Three's Company and even Dick Van Dyke's name. Peter is enraged at the FCC's actions, and on advice from Channel 5 News reporter Tom Tucker, he decides to start his own TV network, which he calls PTV, on which he broadcasts classic shows unedited and uncut, and later introduces original programming such as Brian and Stewie's sitcom Cheeky Bastard, Quagmire's Playboy After Dark-esque Midnight Q, Dogs Humping, and The Peter Griffin Sideboob Hour.
PTV becomes a huge success, but Lois is furious about everyone's lust for perverted TV, as she is concerned over the issue of how children will be influenced by his programming (in the episode's DVD release, Peter and Cleveland, in a parody of Jackass, defecate on top of Lois' car). Brian then tells Lois that parents and legal guardians are the ones who should take full responsibility for what children watch on TV, and also points out that there are much worse influences besides TV. Regardless, Lois calls the FCC to have PTV shut down, prompting Peter, Brian, and Stewie to perform an elaborate musical number about the absurdity of the FCC's regulations. Despite being impressed with the song, the arriving FCC representatives shut down PTV. When Peter tells the FCC representatives that they cannot prevent people from being who they are even after they censor television, they decide to take on the challenge.
The representatives start to censor any foul language and inappropriate behavior in Quahog, ruining their times of privacy; for instance, a black "censor's bar" is pulled over Peter's genitals by FCC employees as he leaves the shower, all expletives are overdubbed with an air horn, and audible farts are banned in public (replaced with a dubbing of Steven Wright punchlines). Everyone in Quahog is angered by this, except for Lois, who approves of the FCC's actions, believing that everyone in Quahog needs a lesson in decency. However, she realizes that the FCC's guidelines prevent her and Peter from having sex. Peter angrily berates her, and she apologizes for her overzealous actions. They lobby Congress to have the FCC's rulings reversed; at first they disagree due to their strong support of the FCC, but they relent when Peter honorably retorts by making them realize the resemblance of many Washington buildings to various private parts and any other body parts associating with it, such as the Capitol Building to a breast. With the oppression of the FCC finally over, Lois congratulates Peter, and the family settles down to watch an uncensored episode of The Brady Bunch that prominently features toilet humor.